Unloving

The Lord Jesus said that the first or foremost command of all is to love God.  He quoted Deuteronomy 6:5 when He said, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength” (Mark 12:30; cf. Matthew 22:37).  He went on to say that the second command is: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself” (Mark 12:31).  “On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets” (Matthew 22:40).

The noun agape means “love” or outgoing concern for another.  Christ added a further dimension to the love commandment when He told His disciples, “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another.  By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35).

Jesus adds that the love we express to other believers must be patterned after His own sacrificial love for us.  Christians are not only “believers” but also “lovers”!  We love God with all our heart, we love Jesus, we love fellow brothers and sisters, and we even love enemies (Luke 6:27-28).  Thus, Paul wrote, “Let all that you do be done in love” (1 Corinthians 16:14).

If love is so central to our life in Christ, surely a lack of love is a most heinous sin.  Paul writes, “If anyone does not love the Lord, he is to be accursed” (1 Corinthians 16:22).  Our love for Jesus must surpass a love for anyone on earth (Matthew 10:37), and all other legitimate loves seem like “hatred” in comparison (Luke 14:26).  If we don’t love Jesus, we will be cursed or condemned by God!  It is no wonder that Paul could say that those who have “unloving” attitudes are “worthy of death” (Romans 1:31-32).

The apostle also said that in the “difficult times” of the last days, there would be people who are “unloving” in character (2 Timothy 3:3).  They are ones who are “lovers of self, lovers of money,” and are “lovers pleasure rather than lovers of God” (2 Timothy 3:1-4).  Yes, they are “lovers”—but they love the wrong things. They do not have a burning passion and love for God.  This describes society as we know it.  How many truly have a deep and earnest love for God and for the Lord Jesus Christ?

While some claim to love God, they don’t have a love for people.  Scripture describes it in this way: “If someone says, ‘I love God,’ and hates his brother, he is a liar; for the one who does not love his brother whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen” (1 John 4:20).  Again, John describes this connection between love for God and love for brothers and sisters: “By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and observe His commandments” (5:2).

This is the very point of the judgment description in Matthew 25:31-46.  Jesus the King will say to the righteous that they had (during their life) displayed their love for others and love for Christ when they gave to the needs of the children of God (vv. 37-40).  He will say, “Truly I say to you, to the extent that you did it to one of these brothers of Mine, even the least of them, you did it to Me” (v. 40).  When they loved Jesus, they loved God’s children; when they loved God’s children, they loved Jesus.  Apart from such love, they will be lost (vv. 41-46).  In addition, we are to love all people and not only fellow-believers (cf. Galatians 6:9-10; 1 Thessalonians 5:15).

What does unlovingness include?  It is passing by one’s neighbor’s needs and gentle requests; it is the beginning of unmercifulness.  We are not really interested in others; we are not merciful to them; we do not sympathize with them.  We cannot rejoice with our neighbors and we cannot cry with them.  We do not spoil them with our love, we are not kind to them when they are overlooked or humiliated.  Sometimes our forgetfulness, which we try to excuse by saying that we had so much to do, is nothing but our great unwillingness to love others.  But even when we seem to be working for others and busily helping them, we may actually only be trying to satisfy our own egos. . . . There are not enough words to express all the damage unlovingness can do. . . .

The root of unlovingness is self-love.  We love ourselves so much, and are so involved in ourselves, that we do not have any interest or time left over for others. . . . This is where we have to begin to repent.  We must ask for a repentant heart, because we do not love God and our neighbor.  God, who has promised to answer earnest prayer, will let us repent of our sin against the first commandment, not loving God above all things and our neighbor as ourselves.[1]

Even religious people fail to love God.  They have conceived a “god” of their own imagination, one who will be content with certain forms and rituals but who doesn’t demand a fervent personal love.  Jesus said that “because lawlessness is increased, most people’s love will grow cold” (Matthew 24:12).  He charged some people, “I have this against you, that you have left your first love” (Revelation 2:4).  Does this describe us?  The Lord calls on these “loveless” ones, “Remember from where you have fallen, and repent and do the deeds you did at first” (v. 5).  We cannot enter heaven, the realm of love, if we fail to love God and others now, in this life.

 

[1] Schlink, You Will Never be the Same, pp. 175-177.