Is Premarital Sex Wrong? (Fornication)

Richard Hollerman

We wondered whether it would be better to title this article, “Is Fornication Sinful.” But since sin is wrong, we further thought that this might be redundant. And since fornication is wrong, we must acknowledge that it is sinful. We use the term “premarital sex” above with the knowledge that until recently the question would be “Is fornication wrong?” “Fornication” is wrong and “premarital sex” is wrong since fornication is premarital sex!

What is fornication? “Fornication is generally consensual sexual intercourse between two people not married to each other. When one or more of the partners having consensual sexual intercourse is a married person, it is called adultery.” (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fornication). According to studies, the majority of people in Europe and the West do commit fornication before marriage. Further, it is common in African and Spanish-speaking countries.  However, it is much less common in Asia—such as Japan, China, etc. Further, in Muslim (Islamic) lands, fornication is less common.

We find this quite interesting. Even though religion in such places as Japan, India, China, and Muslim lands is totally corrupt and ungodly, we discover that their sexual morality is higher (or perhaps we should say that their sexual immorality is lower). Beyond this, lands that have been traditionally closer to Biblical Christianity (even though we do find aberrations) have a far higher degree of fornication! We find this quite amazing!

If you are a child of God, our desire is not necessarily to determine how many Americans or others from the West think but what God says is true. If He created us, He has the right to tell us what He wants in the sexual realm and every other realm of life! Thus, the bottom line is not what Americans or Europeans think, or what Arabians, Pakistanis, Indians, Japanese, or Chinese think—but what God Himself knows!

Notice the words of God when He created the first man and woman: “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him” (Genesis 1:18). This shows that the woman was created for the man and this was the beginning of the sexual relationship between the man and the woman. This does indicate that the woman doesn’t independently exist (contrary to many feminists would tell us), but she exists for the man who was created first. Again, this doesn’t at all suggest that the woman is to be treated unkindly or abused in any way. Rather is simply points out the hierarchy that God has created.

We might want to look at the New Testament’s comments on the creation: “Man does not originate from woman, but woman from man; for indeed man was not created for the woman’s sake, but woman for the man’s sake” (1 Corinthians 11:8-9). Obviously, this does not mean that the woman has no purpose on earth but it does show that she was created for the man and not vice versa.

Along with this, we know that neither the man nor the woman is to fulfill himself/herself sexually other than by means of the other sex. Moses says this, “A man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). This one flesh relationship is manifested in marriage.

All of this means this:

• The man and the woman are sexual beings
• The man is not to fulfill his sexuality apart from a partner—his wife.
• The woman is not to fulfill her sexuality apart from her husband.
• The husband and wife are “one flesh” in their relationship.
• The man is not to have sex with any other woman than his wife.
• The woman is not to have sex with any other man than her husband.
• The man is not to touch another man and the woman is not to touch another woman. (Thus homosexuality or sodomy is sinful.)
• Neither the husband nor the wife is to have any sexual contact before marriage.
• The first and only sexual relationship should/must be with one’s life partner.

According to studies, generally speaking both the man and the woman kept themselves for their coming marriage partner before marriage (in the West). This was true for the woman more than the man. Today, we discover that many in America, Europe, and other places do commit the sin of fornication before marriage, while a large number of those from Eastern countries do not commit sexual relations before marriage.

Let’s comment briefly on what God’s view of fornication is. The Lord Jesus says that fornication comes from “out of the heart” and this “defiles” the person (Matthew 15:19-20). Therefore, fornication “defiles” the heart and body of a person! Further, “fornicators” “will not inherit the kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-10). We realize that many young men and women today deny this, reject it, or deride it, but it is absolutely true.

Fornication is a “deed of the flesh” and will prevent one from inheriting the kingdom of God (Galatians 5:19-21). “Immorality” (or fornication) is not “proper among saints” (Ephesians 5:3) and the fornicator will have no “inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God” (5:5). In fact, because of fornication and like sins, “the wrath of God” will come (v. 6). This shows that this is very, very serious. Do we wish to experience God’s wrath for all eternity? Then, we must avoid fornication and every other sin.

We are to consider “the members” of our earthly body as “dead” to fornication (Colossians 3:5). So serious does God consider fornication and other sins that “the immoral person” will have his or her part in “the lake that burns with fire and brimstone” which is the second death (Revelation 21:8). Finally, the fornicator will spend eternity “outside” of the heavenly city (not inside the city) (22:15).

We can see from all of this several definite facts:

• We must not get our view of sexuality from surrounding culture.
• Our views must not come from the country in which we live.
• We must not determine our views on sexuality (or fornication) from our friends, relatives, or neighbors.
• We realize that many of our views of sexuality come from unbelieving and immoral educators (whether elementary school, high school, or college and university).
• We should saturate our minds and hearts with God’s Word found in Scripture.
• We must not derive sexual views from TV, the Internet, magazines, newspapers, for from other worldly input.
• The only rightful, accurate, and trustworthy source of sexual truth must come from God’s own Word (the Bible)

Whether we marry or do not marry, still the Word of God must be our guide on sexual truth. Whether we ever have any contact with the opposite (or same!) sex, our views must come from God’s own truth—the Bible. Whether we find sexuality fulfilling or not fulfilling, our views must come from God’s Word. If we must live in celibacy, let us remain pure before marriage, through marriage, or after marriage. God’s word will be our judge (John 12:48)—and not prevailing culture, or sinful society, or education, or entertainment, or friends, or family, or any other input.

Let’s remember that our life on earth will be extremely brief (at best, fewer than 100 years) but eternity is endless! Further, since God created you and me, we are to be subject to Him in every way. Let us look to Him and His will and no other source!

If you have committed fornication and are guilty of this (and you know it), we encourage you to repent. “Repent and return, so that your sins may be wiped away” (Acts 3:19).