Question:

Is it Okay to Live with my Boyfriend or Girlfriend?

Answer:

Please read my answer below and look up the words from the Bible!

The View of God on the Sin of Fornication

Yesterday we were doing some research on the view that God has on fornication.  I continue to have this information (in computer files) but am not using it just now in this message. But I did discover that most independent, government, educational, and virtually all social sources don’t even like the term “fornication” but prefer such “non-condemnatory” terms as “pre-marital intercourse,” “living together,” “pre-marital sex” or “unmarried sex.” This, of course, just looks at the matter without any regard for the truth of God.

I also discovered that most married couples do commit fornication before marriage. (We are referring to America, of course.) Also, many, many (perhaps most) couples live together in fornication before marriage—or apart from marriage.  These disturbing facts should not shock you or me—but they do shock us.  According to this research, most couples would not think of living together before marriage only a hundred years ago. But, like so many other sexual matters, even this began to change as the twentieth century progressed and it began to radically change in the decade of the 1960s (the so-called “decade of the sexual revolution”). From this, we should see one of the reason for the astronomical rise in divorce as well.

The secular dictionary defines fornication as “voluntary sexual intercourse between two unmarried persons or two persons not married to each other” and fornicate is defined as “to commit fornication” (Random House Webster’s College Dictionary). This simple definition should be clear enough for us all to see the meaning.

We know that this is somewhat incomplete for a person who has been married before and illegitimately divorced can commit adultery and this is sometimes referred to as fornication also. Just recently I’ve been reminded that different ones I’m acquainted with freely lived in fornication before marriage or instead of marriage, thus this is very much fresh in my mind.

Although this present article pertains to the United States in particular, we know that all of this is also related to the whole world. Most countries on the earth reflect this immoral catastrophe, especially such places as North and South America, Europe, as well as most of the Far Eastern nations. A few Muslim countries don’t seem to have the same problem with sexual immorality. This is to their credit. It seems that along with vast doctrinal aberrations may come a more restricted view of sexual immorality!

We don’t wish to go into a technical article, with secular facts and figures, but just wish to draw our attention to several scriptures that tell us what God our Creator thinks about this sexual sin. Notice that Jesus our Lord says that “from within, out of the heart of men” proceed “fornications” (along with other sins) (Mark 7:21-23). In other words, fornication is not merely an external act but it also involves an internal motivation or a spiritual aspect. Jesus says that this “defiles” a person (v. 23).

Without using the term “fornication” here, we also read this: “God gave them over in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, so that their bodies would be dishonored among them” (Romans 1:24). Thus, not only is homosexuality a perverse and perverted form of sexual expression (vv. 26-27), but also any sexual “impurity” is also condemned. As we continue to read the Word of God, we see that “the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 6:9). But then we read that “fornicators” are part of the “unrighteous” who will not enter God’s kingdom (vv. 9-10). This shows how serious this sin is. In fact, as Paul tells us, “the wages of sin is death” (Romans 6:23). And those who practice immorality (fornication)  and other sins are “worthy of death” (1:32).

As we continue to read how God views fornication, we see that it is a “deed of the flesh” that will keep one from inheriting the kingdom of God (Galatians 5:19-21).  We also learn that “no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God” (Ephesians 5:5-6). The term “immoral” is a reference to fornication also—or “sexual immorality.” Turning the page of Scripture to Colossians, we read that “the wrath of God” will come on those who practice “immorality” or fornication (Colossians 3:5-6).

One final scripture should suffice. In Revelation 21:8 we read that “immoral persons” (in the Greek, this would be fornicators) will spend eternity in “the lake of fire” (see also 20:14-15).

Can we now see how serious it is to commit fornication as perhaps 90% of Americans do? Even though it is a popular sin and even a common sin, God considers it serious enough to send a person to eternal condemnation if they die unforgiven of this sin. Further, we know that there are very serious consequences in this life as well since sin continues to bring its evil influences onto life and relationships. Those who commit fornication before marriage have an assortment of attitudinal problems and sins that often plague them through life!

Does this mean that these 90% of Americans (and this would be true of Europeans and all others on earth) will necessarily go to hell because of fornication. This may be true in general—but not necessarily or inevitably! What do we mean? After mentioning that the Corinthian believers had practiced fornication before salvation (1 Corinthians 6:11)—and this would include all other sexual sin, such as prostitution, adultery, homosexuality, etc.—Paul gives us these blessed and welcome words: “Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.”

Can you see what we mean by this? This truth is that even though many of the Corinthians had been fornicators (and were guilty of other sins) before they were saved, they were forgiven! They “were” (past tense) fornicators. But now they were not. They had been “washed” from their fornication. They had been “sanctified” (or set apart from their sin). They had been “justified” or declared righteous before God. In other words, they were “new creatures” in Christ Jesus (cf. 2 Corinthians 5:17). They were forgiven! Apart from this forgiveness, they would have perished in their sin! But God had forgiven them through Christ and His perfect sacrifice!

Have you committed fornication in the past? In other words, did you commit sexual intercourse with your present husband or wife before marriage? Or are you committing fornication right now with a member of the opposite sex? Or did you “live with” another person before marriage, committing fornication once or repeated times? Or did you leave your first companion and divorce him or her for unscriptural reasons and marry another person, with whom you are now “married” with the government’s approval. As well as your family’s or friends’ approval? Or did you commit fornication in some other form or fashion? Perhaps this was in the past or perhaps even in the present.

First Corinthians 6:9-11 says that you may be forgiven of all of this and be free in God’s sight!  Of course, this forgiveness comes to one who has given all of his or her life to God through Jesus Christ! (You can learn more about this from other articles on this website.) And this also presupposes that you are willing to fully repent or view your past sexual sin as God does and determine to turn away from it.  If you are presently committing fornication or have in the past—without forgiveness—you must renounce this and determine not to commit this sin again!

Regardless of what society says, let us take God at His Word and believe Him. Regardless of what the educators say, what Hollywood says, what the government says, what your friends and family may say, or what the TV may say, we know that God’s Word is true! We will be judged by Christ on the last day and this will be a terrifying thing if we die as a fornicator or as any other kind of sinner, apart from God’s full and free forgiveness (John 12:48). Will you come to Him now, without excuse and without delay?

–Richard Hollerman